Asking For Help is a Social Skill that Could Prevent Suicide.

In addition to my regular posts on social skills, I want to take a moment to talk about an important topic in honor of September being Suicide Prevention Month. In this blog, I’ll be weaving these two themes together to highlight skills that we can teach children from a young age that could save lives. That is the skill of knowing how to ask for help. 

Have you ever noticed how young children are full of questions? It seems like they never stop communicating and asking why, how, who, and what. Asking questions is a normal part of development. It's something that people often unintentionally shut down. This skill of asking questions can be closely related to asking for help. Ultimately, asking for help is just asking another question. 

Now, I am not saying answer every single question that your child asks, but I am saying teach them that it's okay to ask questions. Teach them how to ask for help when they get frustrated tying their shoe or trying something new, and encourage them to ask for help when they are struggling in school. Let them see you asking for help. Fear of embarrassment, other kids at school, and many life challenges can often make kids feel like asking for help makes them look weak or incompetent. So, combat the natural way of things by letting them know they have a safe place to ask questions and that needing help is not a weakness. 

The other part of this is teaching them how to ask for help. As grown-ups, how often do we need help and not know what to ask for, who to ask, how to ask, or what we even need? I know it happens to me all the time. I overthink asking for help, only to realize later I had so many people ready to help if I had just asked.

When it comes to wanting to commit suicide, people often ask for help without really asking. Often, we hear about someone indirectly asking for help by 

• Giving treasured items away

• Calling you out of the blue

• withdrawing from friends and family

  
  

  Then we look back and go, “Man, I wish I had seen the signs. I would have helped.”   Maybe if people knew how to ask and that it was safe to ask for help, we wouldn't have to read between the lines; we could help the people we love see how valuable they are before it's too late to ask for help. 

There is a curriculum I used when I was a teacher called the Boys Town Curriculum. I highly recommend it when teaching new skills to children of all ages. This is how they break down asking for help.

“Whenever you need to ask for help,

1. Look at the person  

2. Ask the person if they have time to help you  

3. Clearly explain the kind of help you need 

4. Thank the person for helping.” 

These instructions are simple and may seem cheesy, but the point remains the same. Find an adult you trust, clearly and directly state your need. I know in the moment that can seem so overwhelming and scary. One of the best ways to combat fear and anxiety is repeated success (more on this in a future blog). If you have a history of knowing how to ask for help and being met with a safe place, you can overcome fear and ask for help. 

Too Long Didn't Read (TLDR): Parents, from a young age, teach your kids how to ask for help. Kids know that asking for help is NOT a weakness, and there are adults out there who want to help you. Even if you feel alone, you are not. Just ask.

Warning Signs of Suicide.” National Institute of Mental Health, U.S. Dept. of Health & Human Services, 2025, www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/warning-signs-of-suicide.